Time, you are a friggin’ jerk. What with your progressing steadily, marching forth, carrying on. Making the space between today and the wedding smaller and smaller.
Less than six months to go? NOT COOL, TIME. Not. Cool.
How is my list of undone wedding things supposed to keep up with your relentless pace? It’s like you want me to be organized and dedicated and committed to planning my wedding. I am only those things in cover letters! [Potential employers: I’m just kidding! As you know, I would never use such cliché descriptors in a cover letter. Hire me! XOXO!]
Look, sometimes I have more important things to worry about than my wedding. Sometimes I don’t have more important things to worry about, but whatever wedding task is at the top of my list is boring/frustrating/scary for me to take on right now.
Time, I’ve heard you wait for no one, but can you maybe make an exception? I’ll give you a plus one to my wedding! I know you’ve been looking for a chance to make the moves on Tide.