Movie Review: Wedding Crashers

True story: a group of dudes crashed my finlaws’ wedding. Before they could even make it to the bar, they got hit with the “who are you?” confrontation. By the groom. They were escorted out a few seconds later.  The moral: crashing weddings is not only wrong, it is stupid.

The movie Wedding Crashers is both wrong AND stupid, and not just about the advisability of sneaking in uninvited to weddings. The premise of crashing weddings as sport pisses me off not only because it glorifies lying and stealing, but because most of the characters’ motivation for crashing is that women at weddings are “so aroused by the thought of marriage that they’ll throw their inhibitions to the wind.” They’re crashing weddings because it is an easy way to get laid. Yes, it’s much easier to get a woman into bed by doing extensive research, crafting a false persona, ingratiating oneself to a large group of strangers at a private event, and spouting lies about one’s military service than it is to, I dunno, go on freakin’ Craigslist and find out who else in the city is horny that night. Or god forbid, to actually bother to date.

Insisting that casual sexual encounters with women requires detailed subterfuge is so dehumanizing and sad. You know what else is dehumanizing and sad? Making the subject of women’s sexuality out to be inherently comedic. See the slapsticky subplot about Isla Fisher’s Gloria, a character saddled with stereotypes from both sides of the virgin/whore dichotomy. She also rapes Vince Vaughn’s character, which is played for laughs. Because what was missing from all the other wedding comedies out there? Rape! Vince Vaughn even becomes the Laura to her Luke and marries her after he finds out she wasn’t a virgin after all (Verdict: prude chicks are worse than rapists). She was lying about being a virgin, because sexually aggressive women are unstable. Normal chicks will only accept sexual advances, not make them, and only after being sufficiently hoodwinked.

Also hilarious: Jane Seymour making sexual advances to Owen Wilson. Those cougars! They think they could possibly be attractive even though they are old! That’s really funny, right? Not as funny as the rapping granny having sexual fantasies about FDR and calling Eleanor Roosevelt a “rug muncher” at the dinner table.

Which reminds me: homosexuality is also inherently comedic, and gay people are as socially inappropriate as sexually-forward women. So when Gloria’s little brother climbs into bed with Vince Vaughn, who is still tied up from being raped, he doesn’t, you know, acknowledge the ropes, and he certainly doesn’t take an explicit denial of consent at face value. It would be a lot funnier if he kept on hitting on Vince and then hid in a closet when his dad barged in. Yes! Literally! Chucklez!

So, yeah, this movie makes me want to barf, and I guess it is because I’m a humorless feminist who can’t enjoy anything. It was a huge hit among fun-loving American movie goers, and I can see why people would like it. Wedding Crashers is funny despite the despicable worldview that directs it to most of its comedy. If I watched it under the influence of enough cold medicine (or internalized misogyny) such that my troublesome feminist brain didn’t get in the way, I’d probably enthusiastically recommend it.

But, as it stands, this movie makes me want to retire from  blogging about wedding movies and/or humanity.

17 responses to “Movie Review: Wedding Crashers

  1. Yeah, it’s pretty bad. I mostly watch it when its on because I’m sucked into the hot vortex of Rachel McAdams beauty. Girl crush!

  2. What are finlaws? I’m not sure you’ve used that term before here, but I might’ve missed it.

    The one thing I felt somewhat redeemed the ridiculousness of the premise was I think there was some acknowledgement and self-awareness that these guys were total losers for indulging in this “sport,” after they showed that funeral guy.

    • Finlaws = Future Inlaws.

      You make a decent point about the funeral guy, but the fact is he still successfully meets women that way. It doesn’t really change how the movie depicts women, just how it judges the men who go after them.

      • True. Modern gender equality: let’s judge and objectify everyone now, not just women!!!

        And +1 to what BirdRoughsIt says below. Have you thought about reviewing the American Pie wedding movie? I watched the first two, I think, and thought they were actually on the better end in terms of its treatment of the female characters in this genre of gross-out boy movies.

      • I forgot the American Pie wedding movie exists! I actually liked the first two, so I will have to add it to my queue. Thanks!

  3. Don’t retire from movie reviews! They are funny and make me rethink things, even when I consider myself really critical! I thought this movie was funny and have seen it, like, 4 times; I will probably never watch it again. And that’s important! I mean, if smart angry feminists aren’t picking up on these HUGE things (virgin/prude thing especially jumps out at me… interesting (and well articulated!)), we need SOMEONE to point it out to us. And then movies will get better and all will be well in the world?

    Anyway, you rock. Have a good Tuesday 🙂

  4. Yes, thank you for articulating all that is wrong with this movie. It has always bothered me but in a fuzzy, non-identifiable way. You put it into words for me!

  5. Temporarily Anonymous

    I work with a guy who hooked up with his soon-to-be-wife at a wedding. After the wedding where they hooked up, he was calling her “A Stage Five Clinger”. Now they live together and just got engaged. Yeah, he’s stupid. It’s sad that movies like this give some guys something evil to look up to.

  6. I seriously thought I was the only person who hated this movie. Of course, I hate most (all?) Vince Vaughan movies and pretty much the whole dumb dude genre of movie.

  7. I have never seen this movie and certainly don’t want to now, ha ha. sounds horrific. I do think Isla Fisher is pretty adorable though

  8. I HATED this movie. Saw it with a bunch of friends when it came out… it seemed like everyone else in the theater was laughing uproariously, except me.

  9. I loved that movie….it was so fun

  10. yes! thank you for putting this into words. I could only come up with one: stupid. I saw this one in the theater on a slow night with the boy. We spent the entire time looking at each other incredulously about why the rest of the audience was roaring with laughter.

  11. Pingback: Movie Review: American Wedding | HitchDied

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